life consists of so many things.

i can honestly say i wish i was there. yep.

I feel much better now. And although some may say this kind of day was a not-so-good one, I can say that I had a good day. I liked it. Very different from my normal days.

I got my nose pierced:) Just a small diamond stud. It hurt A LOT! One of the worst pains I've experienced. But it was worth it. I like it.

It's almost 9:30PM. I'm pretty tired though. A couple of friends are coming to pick me up, and I'm going back to her house. Sooo, it should be fun. I saw a couple of friends at target today, and it was pretty cool. Hugs are always great. I feel I need hugs.

I'm trying to be calm. I have all the reasons in the world to be completely relaxed, but for some reason I get worked up over absolutely nothing. It's strange. Everything's good though.

I love that life consists of so many great things. I love that I'm at the point in my life, and within the next few years, where I can do anything my heart desires. I love my family, but sadly, they didn't do much with their lives. And that is cool if that is the life that they want to live. It's just different than what I want. For example, I want a good education, and a career. I want to travel, I want to do spectacular things. It's not impossible, because I truly, truly believe if you want something you should follow your urge, and do whatever you can to get to the place you would like to be at. I feel it's my calling to help people. It's awesome. God is awesome. It's all awesome. I get so excited about life. Some people say I'm carefree/careless. No, I care about MANY things and MANY people. I just don't care about the negativity and drama. I'm not going to completely ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist, but I'm NOT going to solely focus on the bad. I'm going to live my life like God wants us all to. I laugh, I sing, I dance, I never am anyone but myself. I don't believe I should have to. I am not afraid of opinions. My personal happiness is now a priority. Things are changing.

Some simple things I want to do within the next 6 months or so:

-cry in the pouring rain (sounds depressing, but i think crying is a way of letting everything out)

-make some hilarious youtube videos (i don't know, i'm weird like that)

-be someone's hero (wow, how great would that be, hearing someone tell you that?)

-do charity work (so rewarding)

-grow closer to people (♥)

i promise you, with faith, you can live the most amazing life you want. happiness is not about the circumstances you've been in, it's about the choices you make now.

i love you.

this is the correlation of salvation & love.

shello. ♥ i'm feeling very sick. tear tear.

i just got out of the shower. ahh. i feel much better. just thought i would tell you.
i feel as if i'm in some sort of daze. but not.

i wish i was feeling better, so i didn't have to feel like laying here is my only option. i wanted to do things and see people, but it's looking pretty impossible as of now. eh.

i just wanted to say hi, and remind you that you are loved by many:)

make it a good day.

this is a short post, i know. i need to sleep for an hour or so. then see how i'm feeling, and it will hopefully be better!

lessons learned.

overall, a good day. tomorrow=the last day of school this week for me. i'm not going to school friday. for a few reasons.

i'm honestly so happy that god has given me the ability to look past the negativity and see the good things most of the time. i love it, and i'm sooo thankful for it. it has gotten me through EVERYTHING. i promise, optimism is really the key to happiness. and happiness is the key to life.
i heard this quote, and it goes like this:
"my mom always told me the key to life was happiness. at school, they asked me what i wanted to be when i got older. i wrote down happy. they told me i didn't understand the assignment. i told them they didn't understand life."
i like that.

i love laughing! i find myself laughing and smiling so much lately. i finally, finally...know who i am. or know most things about myself. i'm learning so much about life and how to handle situations the right way. i've learned, when people infect you with meanness, infect them back with kindness. i've learned to look past peoples' mistakes and not to hold it against them. i've also learned life is all about choices, and how you choose to view your world is a direct reflection on your life. i have learned faith and belief in yourself is the biggest risk you can take, but is the most rewarding. i've learned no matter what people think of you, you have to hold your head up high and just be you. being a friendly, open, and nice person is the best decision i ever made. i've learned you just have to let go of the things that upset you, and believe tomorrow will be a better day. i've learned dreaming isn't a fantasy, it's a reality you can make if you believe in it. The last thing I'm going to say, i've learned that if you seek god, and ask for his help, he truly will transform your life.

some of these lessons have came easy to me. some i learned the hard way. having to make mistakes helps mold you into a better person, i believe.
i no longer think your past defines who you are.
i think people CAN change now.
i've witnessed it first hand.
i realized the way i was viewing my world was causing me to infect my own self even more. when i realized it was a choice to be happy, not about the circumstances you have had, i started living life. and loving it.

i wish everyone knew these things. i'm sure there are many, many things other people know that i don't even have a clue about too. but hey, i'm living my life. i'm learning things daily. i'm trusting god more and more. i'm finding things out that i never knew. i'm starting to believe in myself. and realizing the good things that are in store for me. and although i get sad and down often, i will always have the happiness inside of me. i will always have the ability to cope through things. and always, i will be corbin. and no one else.

(:

silence.

small, random acts of kindess. --> try it.

well, things are interesting and people are interesting, and this whole world is just interesting.

currently listening to: pretend by secondhand serenade

he creates the most relaxing music.

i don't understand why or how i'm feeling the way i am.

i just want someone. i feel like talking to somebody. who won't hang on every word i say, or judge anything i say. i love the kind of people who you can be silent with. you know you're comfortable around someone if you can say absolutely nothing around them and not feel awkward. i have that with a few people. it's kind of cool. a deeper level of friendship.

i want to face my fears, but i'm not really sure what they are. i think i'm really doing a good job in my life. a few aspects need to be changed. for example, i'm not a serious person. i want to work on people taking me more seriously, because i'm always, well a lot of times, joking around. i don't show my other side often. it's like that's all i know how to be. i feel like a different person now though. i really do. maybe i'm growing up. or perhaps i'm just changing into the person i've become. i'm not sure.

i'm going to work on killing people with kindness. when someone is mean or rude to me, i'm going to be extremely nice back. i'm a nice person, just sometimes i say exactly what's on my mind. i'm not the kind of person who likes hiding how i'm feeling. been there. done that. and it didn't work out good. i learn from my mistakes. always. i try not to make the same mistake twice. it's sort of ignorant.

if you think i'm the type of person who can let you go without saying goodbye...you're wrong. if i love you, i basically always, always will. and i have a hard time turning my head away from someone i care about. people are very important to me. very much so.

i love the feeling of relaxation, with no worries. i love the feeling of tiredness when it's early. so you can wake up rested. but i also like the feeling of being energetic at night. i'm a night person for sure. i'm not in a bad mood in the morning. but nights are when i get my energy usually. since school started, i've been tired ALL THE TIME, which sucks. eh.

it's 8:00 and i'm soooo tired. i'm going to attempt to go to sleep. yeah right. keyword: attempt. hey, i'll have a little faith. let me say this instead. i will go to sleep early.

HA!

love!!!<3

one more thing...silence is golden.

the world is yours. it's what you make it.

Yes. This is my life. And to be perfectly honest, somedays I don't know how I'm going to make it through. Sometimes I get down for no reason, and I can't explain it. Suddenly.

I need to constantly receive love. Is that a bad thing? I like to be loved, and to love. I feel I need to be loved, or feel loved. I'm a lover, not a fighter. I believe it makes the world go round.

I'm listening to the news, President Obama is speaking about a bomb-threat on an airplane on Christmas day. This is the first that I've heard of it. Partly because I don't watch the news anymore. I used to. I find that they use scare tactics, that I'm not fond of. I find that the news sort of depresses me. I know I need to know what's going on in the world, but I guess it just isn't a big deal for me. God will keep me safe no matter what...what else do I need to know?

Last year, I lost friends and became closer to people. It all evens out. I had my moments where I couldn't stand anything, and I had the best, most funfilled days I will never forget. All I know is, I'm changing this year. I'm doing things differently. It's hard to get out of habits--SOO hard! But I'm trying. And I think I'm succeeding so far. There's things that I'm working on. Becoming a well-rounded person is looking like more of a possibility as the days go by.

I think there is truly beauty in every person. I do.

Water. Earth. Sky. Sunshine.

Please smile, it helps. Say "doo da doo, life is good." AND BELIEVE IT!

love always.

thoughts about human civilization.

Honestly, I'm not feeling inspired and my head is clouded. I wasn't feeling sleep-deprived until I got home from school, which I guess is good.


Thoughts are running through my mind. I see a lot of things. I'm seeing the true reality of life. I'm seeing there's more to life than I originally thought. And what most think. I'm starting to see the big picture. I'm starting to see that no matter what happens, we are still living and capable of a good life. Everyone's definition of a "good life" is totally different. Perceptions are always based on the individual. It's so odd. How we all look at things. I could look at the sky and see blue. And you could look at the sky and see a totally different color. It's something we will never know for sure. Humans are so afraid of things they are unsure of. Especially with technology advancing as fast as it is. We feel like we know all of the answers. And the things we don't know, we are very curious about, yet there's some fear in there too. We know things people never even imagined 100 years ago, or even way shorter than that.
I remember seeing sci-fi "futuristic" movies. I'm starting to think the earth and technology is actually a lot like those movies. We are capable of doing so many things, things that you don't even know about.


That was a long paragraph, and I'm sure if I saw that, I would skim through it and not bother reading it all. While I'm on this topic...


All humans want one thing. To be loved. Every one of us long for that. We want to feel safe & to be loved.
We are more similiar than you think. We're all the same. Not one of us better than the homeless man sitting next to us on the public bus. We're equal.


The people who live their lives with hatred, need the most love. Because those who live their lives with hostility are the ones who are searching for the most love.



I am happy today, because I feel it was a good day. For once, semi-good school day.

I got a text today that instantly made me smile. I love those kind of texts. It says:
"Hi, I just wanted to let you know that I love you and I'm glad that I have you in my life."


Wow. How simple, yet powerful. Everyone needs to hear that every so often. This person is one of the most amazing people. I know so many of those kinds of people. & for that, I'm so thankful. This person truly holds a special part of my heart. I feel like they are one of the best friends I have ever had, or maybe even the best. Thank you to the people I will never be able to tell how much they truly mean to me.
In return to that text, I said I love you too and I hope you will always be in my life, or something along those lines.
The returned text after that said, "i will, forever."
Forever. That's unconditional love. I'm never letting that kind of love go. I can't. Too many people are close-minded and selfish. And I just need the people who love me, because they are truly, honestly, the best people I've ever met. It's awesome having someone that will accept everything you do and say with ease, and be there to help you whenever you need it. I'm building a support system more and more.

if there's one thing i'm absolutely sure of, i'm going to reach my goals and be happy...

lovelovelove.